Looking for relationship advice or marriage me advice? I talk about all of the love languages in todays blog post. We all communicate and recieve love differntly from one another and it’s important to understand this for healthy relationships.
In today’s discussion, we dive into Love Languages
If you would like to jump straight into the types of languages, click here.
As most of us are in quarantine, we are now spending more time with our loved ones than we probably ever have.
No matter how much we love each other, with the walls closing in on us, our love may be put to the test, just a little bit. 🙂
However, during these times of uncertainties, we need to show love for one another. And it’s important to know that love translates differently for others. We want to make sure we are communicating this love in the best way possible.
The passage down below is an example of the effects of not comprehending the importance of love languages in a relationship.
Home Late For Dinner
“Honey, sorry I’m late.” Charley barges through the front door to greet his wife, Charlotte.
Charlotte sits on the couch, facing the T.V, the volume is turned down low. Her attention is not on the show, instead, she stares out the window that is toward the left of the T.V. Her eyes are puffy, as she had been crying for the past hour, feeling incredibly alone.
Charley, in his optimistic voice, still unaware of how upset his wife is, says, “I got you your favorite flowers.”
As Charlotte hears his footsteps from behind her grow closer, she lacks the desire to turn around. The flowers are a nice gesture, she thinks, but her heart still aches. It was his third time canceling plans on her. Though he had a valid reason each time, it was really starting to get to her.
As Charley reaches the couch and takes a seat, he notices just how bothered his wife is.
“Hey,” she mumbles.
Charley is a bit taken aback. He knew that she was disappointed but didn’t think she would be this upset that he canceled plans on her. “Hey,” he moves closer to her “you okay?”
“It just really hurts me when we can’t spend time together, especially if it’s something we planned,” she explains.
“I promise, I’ll work on that,” he hugs his wife and she falls into his arms.
What do you think Charlotte’s love language is? Let’s find out.
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What’s a love language?
A love language is a way to communicate or express your love to another. How you wish to receive love from another can be different from how they want to receive love from you. Not understanding how someone wants to be loved and vis versa can have tremendous negative effects on a relationship. This does not just relate to romantic relationships but also, friendships and family members as well. Each of us has a primary love language. And in order for our relationships in life to be successful, it’s important to know their language.
How many love languages are there?
1. Words of Affirmation
Verbal compliments are one way to communicate to your loved ones that you acknowledge, appreciate, and love them. When someones primary language is words of affirmation, they feel recognized, valued, and especially loved when you point out their positive attributes. These can be external or internal characteristics that you admire about them. (ex. “that hairstyle looks beautiful on you”)
2. Acts of Service
Completing a task for a loved one that you know they would appreciate means, I love you, fro people whose primary language is acts of service. You may have to put a bit more thought into these deeds compared to the rest of the four. Consider what chore gives your loved one the most fuss, time, and detail within their day, and complete that chore for them! In simplest terms, make their life easier. (ex: doing laundry, cooking a meal, etc.)
3. Receiving Gifts
Gifts are something that many people value. I know what you’re thinking. Isn’t that shallow? Well, not exactly, because you see, it’s not the gift itself that matters but the thought behind the gift! Ah..that makes sense now, doesn’t it? 🙂 (ex: picking flowers or a pint of their favorite ice cream on your way home from work)
4. Quality Time
When someones primary language is quality time, it’s really important that you make sure to spend one on one time with them. This means no TV or phone, just your undivided attention, and conversation. They need to know that you value what they say. If you don’t talk to them or are not interested about their day, do you really love them? Ok, ok. – I might be just a bit biased on this one, since quality time is my primary language. But, come on! You have to admit, in a world of social media and technology, it’s becoming harder and harder to get that old school, face to face, conversation going with most people. (ex: choosing to play that video game, when your loved one has been trying to spark a conversation all day, not the best choice!)
5. Physical Touch
Hugs, hugs, and more hugs; it’s that simple. For those who have a pet peeve for “clingy” people, don’t get scared. It doesn’t have to be 24/7 cuddles, but if you want to express your love to someone who’s primary language is touch, sliding away from their hugs or smooches isn’t the best idea. These people essentially feel extremely lonely or unwanted when you may not give them or, like to receive their touch. (ex. holding hands while walking)
Now that we read all about the language of love, what do you think Charolette’s primary language is now? Also, what is your primary language, or your mother’s, partner?
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As always: Stay You. Stay True. Stay Beautiful ♥
Also, check out my self-love children’s book, now available on Amazon! Click Here! <3
Also…
I go by ClassyQueeny and I’m the voice behind BreatheThenLive.com I
encourage my readers to live their life practicing mindfulness, love, and peace. When life gets chaotic and out of wack- just breathe, take your time to find your footing. And when you’re ready, live the life you dream of, because nothing is out of your reach. ❤️